me:
All scientists are hipsters, that's why they wear glasses.
husband:
No.
me:
"I stopped working on electromagnetic induction. It was too current."
husband:
No.
me:
"I used to have a passion for oceanography but I got sick of talking about the mainstream."
husband:
No!
me:
"Of course I'm not a mathematician. Calculus-based models of the universe are SO derivative."
husband:
...
me:
"I'm an expert on geothermal vents--"
husband:
Oh my God.
me:
"--They're probably too deep for you."